How can i get my ex boyfriend back? I’ve heard the generic answers over and over again.?
I’m still madly in love with my ex boyfriend. I have spent over a year trying to get over him, and i’ve come to the conclusion that we are meant to be together and i need to win him back. Everything online is either the generic suggestions that never seem to work or something guaranteed to work but i have to purchase something. please help me. I’m miserable.
September 26th, 2010 at 9:28 pm
First i’d say, please consider that he may not want you back. You said he’s shown no indication that he still has feeling for you. If he doesn’t then there’s not much that you can do. Unfortunately you can’t force love where there isn’t any. If he is only interested in friendship you may find that you need to accept this and take what you can get. Friendship is better than nothing and if you force the issue with him and he doesn’t want a relationship, you may end up without him in your life at all. It’s very telling that he moved on so quickly. It gives the impression that unfortunately it didn’t take him too much effort to get over you. Chances are that if after a year he has made no effort to rekindle your romance he doesn’t want to.
I would suggest that you put this down as a experience in your life that you will never forget, have learned from and that has helped to shape the person that you are. There are people that come along for certain points in your life but simply just aren’t ment to stay.
If you are still determined to try to win him back this is what I would do. . .
Be Confidant:
When your around him be self assured, act it even when your not feeling it. Show him that you don’t need him (even if you do) that you’re a possitive confidant person who knows what she wants men like women who know that they want.
Think:
Think about what went wrong the first time and how you can change it. Why did he think you were cheating on him and does he still believe that you were. You need to know why he was unhappy so you can try tin rectify the problem. Try to establish exactly what he wants from a relationship. And decide if you’re willing to compromise and decide if you are able to give him what he needs. Look Good:
Take care of your appearance nice clothes some makeup enough so that he notices you. Do not go slutty this will just make you look desperate and pathetic, and that will be a big turn off.
Don’t be needy:
A mans brain is not hardwired like a womans, they will not respond to the same things that we do. Love letters, and elaborate romantic gestures won’t tug at his heart strings as it does ours, it will just make him feel pressured and awkward. He’s not going to want to hear that you’ll love him forever or that you can’t get him out of your head. Men don’t think like a woman does. Show it but don’t say it.
Show an interest in him:
What does he like, what does he do for fun. Learn about it and be interested ask him questions. Make sure he gets something from you that he doesn’t get from other females in his life. This will make him want to be around you more and more.
Have a sense of humour:
Laugh at his dumb jokes and make your own.
It’s important to make him laugh, make your company a pleasure to be in.
I’m not going to mention physical side to a relationship because I don’t know how old you are hun. Don’t expect this to work immediately. It will take time and patience. As you’ve been apart for so long it’s not so much a case of winning him back, as he seems to have moved on. It’s a care of making him fall for you all over again.
If all else fails I would directly ask him if their is ever any chance of you two getting back together, accept whatever he says, If you love him you’ll want him to be happy.
You seem to be feeling quite desperate which I understand entirely but please don’t compromise your dignity and self worth, no man is worth that and you will only succeed in getting a reputation for being the needy girl who just didn’t get the message.
The bottom line is that you don’t want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with you. Would you want him with you if it made him unhappy?
Good Luck. I hope it all works out for you.
😀
September 26th, 2010 at 10:15 pm
If it didn’t work the first time, it’s probably not gonna work this time. You might still like him, but does he like you? If you’re meant to be together, you will eventually b together
September 26th, 2010 at 10:43 pm
Well, it depends on who broke up with whom. If you told him that it was over, then he might be a little hesitant to get back with you. However, if it was the other way around, then maybe he can be persuaded. You need to let him know that you have done everything in your power to get over him, and that you just can’t let him go. Do this in a gentle, yet firm way. Don’t sound like you’re desperate or he’ll think that you’ll wait for him forever. Just tell him that you want to be with him, he’s the only one you’ve ever felt this way about, and that your life is incomplete without him. Everyone wants to hear that they’re the focus of someone else’s love (most of the time). I hope this helps and good luck. 🙂
September 26th, 2010 at 11:14 pm
Does he want to to get back with you again?
September 26th, 2010 at 11:40 pm
Try to approach the matter in the right way. Try to communicate with him. Plan ur ways and execute it such that u can again get on with the relation. people have succeeded and with the right approach u might succeed too.
There are some resources like this which can help u get back ur ex.
http://www.get-your-ex-back.info
September 27th, 2010 at 12:25 am
I think you’re making a mistake a lot of girls make when patching things with their ex, especially when love & emotions are involved. I’ll explain
First of all you’re not at fault here but you have to realize that guys brains work a lot differently than girls. His actions may not make sense to you but they can be explained and when you understand them you’ll be able to deal with this a lot better. You should watch this video, it explains it a bit better than me (whether you want to get back WITH him or AT him):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6CsyjK1toY
So in other words you need to know:
– What exactly goes on inside a man’s mind (not only your ex)
– How you can push his emotional buttons so he comes crawling back to you
– Specifically how to make him commit to you after you get him back
Now whether you’ll want to deal with him after or not, and what you want him to commit to, is entirely up to you. The key is to get the control back in your hands.
Does that make sense to you? It’s hard to understand at first unless you’ve dealt with it before already