My husband had his mother to pick out a Valentine card for me, from him?
My husband has never been romantic; he waits until the last minute to do anything for me, but this Valentine’s day he had his mother pick out flowers and a card as my gift from him. I was extremely hurt and I don’t think he sees anything wrong with the whole situation. He had the time and money and he really has no excuse why he didn’t do it himself. What makes it worse is that his mother is very cold and unemotional to him and me and I can’t understand why he would trust her with something so personal. Am I overreacting?
February 9th, 2011 at 5:33 pm
Thats just WRONG!
February 9th, 2011 at 5:44 pm
I think he was just worried he might pick the wrong thing. He still made sure you got somthing right? I mean, would you have rather got nothing? Would that made you feel worse or better?
February 9th, 2011 at 5:58 pm
Yuck!! I am so sorry. I would rather have recieved nothing.
February 9th, 2011 at 6:37 pm
OK, I would be pisted if my hubby did that. He needs to cut the cord. His mom should no better then to pick a card from him to you. She is in much of the wrong as he is.
February 9th, 2011 at 7:26 pm
Hey, at least you got something. I got NOTHING.
February 9th, 2011 at 7:35 pm
Yes, you’re overreacting. Because the thought was there on his part, and at least you got something from him! Do you know how many women have nothing to show from their husbands?
Maybe you complained about what he got you last year (or didn’t get you) so he thought that his mother picking out the gift would be a better idea. Next year, hopefully he’ll know. Would it be better if he gave you the money and YOU went to pick out your own gift? Obviously it’s not his strength. Even if he had the time and the money, it’s just not in him to do it, and you can’t make him. So work with his weakness and try to find a way to be happy with him. Like I said, what if he were to give you the money and let you pick out your own gift? Then you’d be happy with what you got, but maybe not the fact that he didn’t pick it out. But you can’t have everything.
February 9th, 2011 at 8:35 pm
If he has never been romantic then it shouldn’t have come as a surprise to find out that he didn’t bother to choose you a present himself. A lot of men aren’t bothered about Valentines – especially those in long term relationships or marriages, its kind of like: what’s the point? its not as if he has to try to impress you anymore now he has you.
February 9th, 2011 at 9:16 pm
Yes, you are overreacting. You say so yourself, my sweet honey, that your husband has never been romantic. So, what do you expect him to do on Valentine’s Day, the most romantic day of the year? He probably feels totally lost and inadequate when it comes to V-Day. He probably dreads the whole thing. Why don’t you give the poor guy a break. Tell him, “Honey, I really don’t want any cards or gifts. Let’s just go out and celebrate our love over a nice candlelight dinner in our favorite restaurant. I will make the reservation for us.” Just accept the guy, love him for caring enough for trying, and give the guy a break. Tell him not to worry about such things anymore. What is important that you love each other, and you can find many ways to celebrate your love. And, if you really want flowers, take him to a flower store and buy them together, for both of you. He will love you for helping him with this whole chore, and he won’t have to ask his mother for help with it.
February 9th, 2011 at 10:13 pm
Yes you are over reacting. He is probably tired of having what he does criticised so he went to his mother for help. Yes criticised. Lets break down what you have written.
Has never been romantic…waits till the last minute… So in the past you have been unhappy with his choices, hence unromantic, and his timing isn’t to your satisfaction so that is the last minute. So he asked his mommy for help. And that isn’t good enough for you either. He should just give up because it sounds like nothing he does will be good enough.
February 9th, 2011 at 10:35 pm
No I don’t think that you are overreacting at all.
February 9th, 2011 at 10:36 pm
Maybe he feels nervous that he will get the wrong thing.