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I’m currently in a poly relationship, but want to get married, the guy doesn’t. Should i stay and commit?

He knows i want to get married, but claims he can’t commit to marriage because he also loves the other girl. The Poly relationship is still new to me…should i give up my dream of one day being married and having kids of my own? The other chick hates kids and doesnt want anything to do with them. We/I haven’t told her that one day we/I would like to have some…

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3 Responses to “I’m currently in a poly relationship, but want to get married, the guy doesn’t. Should i stay and commit?”

  1. k.gomez said :

    You should end the relationship, not your dream! You don’t want to be #2 for the rest of your life. Plus, if you do have kids in this relationship think about how difficult it would to be to explain to your children a polygamist relationship. Real life is not like ‘Big Love’ A relationship is hard enough between 2 people, why add more?!

  2. einas16 said :

    I hate to break this to you, but polygamous relationships almost never work out for anyone. Jealousies will arise down the line, and it will interrupt any plans of you getting closer with this man.

    your hopes of marriage/children are going to be let down. either talk to this guy about dumping the other chick or learn to date again.

    now…getting rid of this other chick might be harder than getting a drunk guy away from whiskey so listen up. lol u dont wanna do anything illegal right (wink wink)

    just make sure…the “garden boy” doesn’t miss. (wink wink)

    make sure the…chef bakes this other chick a “special pie” (nudge nudge)
    make sure you “alphabetize” her medicine cabinet (hint hint)
    be sure to… “take out …the trash” (poke poke)
    hope you catch my drift(s) (wink wink, poke poke, nudge nudge)

  3. odzookers said :

    Don’t even bother calling this clown’s bluff, and don’t let the door hit you on the butt on the way out. Either he wants to have his cake and eat it too, or more likely he’s too immature to marry anyone and whoever he eventually chooses (and I’ll bet it will be neither of you two) will be getting no prize. Let me ask you this: would you want to work for someone who can’t make up his mind whether he wants to hire someone else? Same deal; the minute things are less than perfect he’ll loudly wish he’s chosen the other girl. Bah.

    A major point–you seem to be in love with the IDEA of “getting married,” not with him. You have romanticized your idea of marriage out of all proportion, and are talking like this guy is your one and only chance, and after that it’s withering away as a spinster. I rather suspect that you’re not ready for marriage, either. Remember: GETTING married is so easy that fools do it every day; BEING married requires a lot more. Been there; done that; bought the t-shirt; got the scars. I have been divorced for 22 years and will marry again next year. So how do I know this one will be good? For three years we have been running two businesses, seated only eight feet apart, for upwards of 14 hrs. a day, and we haven’t killed each other. Besides, we have the same initials and can use the old monogrammed towels.




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